Why Did The Skeleton Cross The Road?
by lizabeyy
Summary: Because he was hoping that Chara would get the message and leave him alone. "Ha, that's funny. You're funny. Asriel, isn't Sans funny?" Cover image belongs to funkitty.


"Hey, I think we missed something," Flowey said with a smirk, when he noticed Chara heading straight for the stairs upon entering Toriel's home.

"No, I don't think so."

"Whatever do you mean, Chara? Normally, this is where we would go to sleep, and Mother would come in with our favourite pie, and..."

"I know, I have other plans."

Flowey blinked before following them down the stairs, "What other plans, exactly?"

"I want to fight Sans."

There was a momentarily blank expression from the flower, "I... what? Now?"

"Mhm," the human hummed, smiling as they walked. This was rather concerning to the flower. Was Chara serious? At least half of the last Genocide run was spent listening to them go on and on about that skeleton. Were they _obsessed?_

 _"Asriel, tell me about all the times you've fought Sans."_

 _"We're here, it's in the next room. Sans is in the next room!"_

 _"Say, Asriel. What do you think Sans does while we're busy?"_

To which, Flowey would respond; "Don't remember", "Don't care", and "Don't know". Well, at least, that's how he would want to respond. Of course, he wouldn't actually say any of that to Chara.

"We just started this timeline and you're just going to go get yourself killed right off the bat?"

"I wonder how strong Sans is at the beginning..."

"I hate the way he throws you around. R-Really, we should at least get the pie."

"I wonder if he'll see me coming."

Golly, they weren't even listening to him.

* * *

Upon leaving the ruins, Chara actually seemed surprised that it was night time. Not that it was easy to tell, with them being underground and all. Any mention of Sans was put on hold, while the duo looked around.

Flowey grinned, "Well, _usually_ we spend the night with Mother~"

"Come now, Asriel. Sass only makes you cuter." Chara kneeled down in the snow, and pressed a finger against their brother's forehead.

"Tch," Flowey glanced away. His sibling chuckled.

"You look cold in all this snow. I could carry you if you like~"

"C-Carry me?"

"Wouldn't that be romantic, though?"

"You think I'm interested in that?"

"I don't know... are you?" At that point, Chara seemed to think it was a funny idea to kiss the flower. They laughed after seeing the reaction to it.

"Y-You, that's..." Oh no, he was flustered.

The laughter only escalated, "Oh, Asriel. You're absolutely _adorable~_ "

"Ch-Chara, come on!"

"I doubt there's a single monster in the underground that can say no to a face like yours." Chara stood, and continued on their way to Snowdin.

"Well, I... _have_ had quite the number of pawns in past timelines." Flowey seemed proud to say, as they trailed behind the human. "In fact, it wouldn't be a lie if I told you that I've had every monster wrapped around my finger at least once. Probably even more than once."

"Oh, is that so?"

"That's right. Goodness, I'm practically the ventriloquist of the whole universe!"

"I wouldn't expect any less of my brother."

"And now that we're on the topic, I know that I've told you this before... I was working on befriending Papyrus, before you, er, before _Frisk_ fell into the underground."

"What were you ever planning on doing with that skeleton?"

"I suppose I could do anything with him now. When Frisk came, they wrote over my ability to go back to the beginning, so I'm stuck with Papyrus. Which isn't bad. In fact, it couldn't possibly have been better. Papyrus was always the most entertaining out of them all, I think."

"I doubt it takes much to manipulate a mind as simple as his." Chara had to agree. "Let's use him against Sans."

"Sans again?"

"Perhaps not right now, but in the next timeline. Let's take Papyrus with us, and then kill him in the judgement hall. It'll be right in front of Sans."

"Come on, neither of us could last the entire time with Papyrus. He's too..."

"I know, but just think of Sans' face~ His... _expression_."

Sans said that a lot. 'Expression'.

 _"That expression on your face... that's the expression of someone who has died seven times. Let's make it an eighth."_

 _"That expression on your face tells me that I can't afford not to care anymore."_

"Well..." At the moment, Flowey could honestly say that he couldn't care less about Sans. "If you see the potential in that, who am I to say no to you?"

"You sound bitter," Chara smiled.

"I'm terribly sorry, is it too obvious?"

The human laughed.

* * *

When they made it to Snowdin, Chara didn't waste any time going into shops or looking around. Flowey thought that was rather ridiculous. Were they seriously thinking of attacking Sans without so much as a single item to heal themselves with? Rather, Chara went straight for the home of the skeletons.

"The front and back doors are locked, but the door on the balcony should be open." They said.

"How can you tell?"

"Oh please, that door leads right into Sans' room. He's far too lazy to lock it."

"I can't argue with that."

They stood in front of the house, and Chara pointed to the balcony. "Frisk's body doesn't float, lift me up."

"I have a better idea." The flower winked, "How about we go home, get Mother's pie, and..."

"No, I'll defeat him without the pie."

"Oh come _on_. He's probably not even awake!"

"I'll wake him up."

"That's a bad idea, and you know it is."

"Asriel, lift me up." Chara demanded a second time, and their sibling moaned.

"Oh, _fine_." A vine shot up from the snow, wrapped itself around the human, and carried them up to the balcony. "Is that door actually unlocked?"

Chara peeked through the glass door, and made the widest grin when they saw their arch nemesis inside. "He's always sleeping~"

Flowey frowned. "Hey, maybe don't just stand there."

"Asriel, you come in, as well."

"I hope you don't expect any help from me."

Chara smiled, "I shouldn't even need to ask. If you hear me crying, you'll come running to my rescue regardless." They didn't need to be right beside the flower to know that he blushed.

"Chara? Be careful."

The human chuckled. They opened the door, and crept into the skeleton's bedroom.

"Don't do anything stupid, I mea-" The door was closed mid-sentence. "..."

Although it wasn't very likely that either of the skeleton brothers were awake, it was just as well that they were here.

He wasn't going to stick around to watch Chara hurt themselves over such silly things. He was just going to go have a lovely conversation with his "friend" instead.

Not that Flowey particularly liked the idea of Chara hurting themselves. There just wasn't anything that he could do about it, as Chara seemed to have made up their mind. Even after all this time, they were still as stubborn as ever.

It was all so silly. Not to mention a complete waste of time.

* * *

While Chara lurked inside of Sans' room, Flowey made a little trip up to Papyrus' window.

Slowly, but surely, Papyrus woke from his slumber in time to be practically assaulted by a smiling Flowey.

"Howdy Papyrus! Is it too early for a visit?"

* * *

Sans was taking his sweet time to wake up, which wasn't unexpected. Truthfully, though, Chara wasn't actually making an effort to wake him.

Rather, they were sitting beside the bed. Their face was barely an inch away from Sans', and they simply stared at him. They wanted to drag him out by his feet, they wanted to snap every bone in his body, but they were also... rather content with just looking at him.

Why did a skeleton need to sleep? It reminded Chara of a joke.

* * *

"Why hello there, Flowey!" Despite the early hour, Papyrus wasted no time in showing his friendliness. "It... _is_ rather early. Very early, actually. Is something the matter?"

"Oh, you know me! I can hardly wait for the day to start."

"That is an attitude that everyone should have. It's only..." the skeleton winced as he looked at the clock, "...Two-fifteen in the morning. Well, I admire your eagerness for getting up and at 'em already!"

The flower laughed, "You bet!"

"If only that lazy brother of mine would follow such a way."

"I think your brother would be fine if he... followed any way at all, really." Since having become aware of the timelines, Sans had turned into something of a wild card. Surely that was why Chara was so interested in him.

"Well, I can't give him too hard of a time. Sans is my brother, after all. However, he should at least be awake before noon!" As Papyrus spoke, his legs started moving towards the door. Was he on his way to wake Sans?

"Say, what's all this, Papyrus?" Flowey pointed to the action figure collection that he had already seen a thousand times.

"Those?" The skeleton stopped, and looked back. "Those are-" He stepped away from the door, and joined Flowey by the table. As he explained the figures, the flower nodded and asked questions about them periodically. All of which were questions that he had previously asked in other timelines, so it was much more like rehearsing lines than anything else. Soon enough, they began chatting about other various things.

"Wow, Papyrus, that sure is interesting."

"And you haven't even heard the best part yet!"

* * *

Perhaps it was because Chara was getting too close for comfort that Sans woke up entirely on his own.

They stared at each other for at least a solid thirty seconds, before Chara broke the silence with a wide smile. "Greetings, Sans!"

The greeting was returned by Chara being lifted into the air, and thrown against the wall.

* * *

"What was that?" The sound of impact was loud enough to be heard in Papyrus' room.

"He probably just fell out of bed or something." Flowey had to stop himself from cringing at the sound of what was, without a doubt, his sibling.

"We'd best check on him..."

"I have a better idea. Why don't we go and make him some of that famous spaghetti of yours?"

"Oh. ...You're absolutely right! There's nothing like a delicious plate of spaghetti to make you feel better. Well then, let's not waste any time!" With that, Papyrus changed course for the kitchen, and Flowey happily followed along after him. It was absolutely a mistake for Chara to have come here without any food.

* * *

"Amazing, Sans! That still hurt, even without all that Determination!" The human got back up to their feet, and went to lean against the tread mill in the skeleton's room.

Why does a skeleton need a treadmill? The better question was; why did Sans have one? They'd understand if it was Papyrus'.

Sans was yet to move from his bed, and was leaning against the wall. "You..." He sounded like he was trying to catch his breath, but that was silly. They hadn't even started fighting yet. "Which kid are you? The one from my dreams... or the one from my nightmares?"

"How about both?" Chara winked.

"Your name was... Frisk, right?" All while he was speaking, Sans' right eye was glowing.

Oh wait, skeletons don't have eyes.

"Wait... Wait, no. Frisk..." It was entertaining how Sans had to take a while for all the memories to come back. "Frisk died a few timelines ago, ain't that right? Funny how everyone else comes back, but they don't."

Well, Frisk wasn't completely 'dead'. They'd might as well be, though.

"That's right. You're Tori's kid. One of them, anyway. I guess all that royal nonsense gives you a bigger head than what my brother has."

"Look at you, figuring things out~" Chara decided it was a good idea to sit down on the bed, and to lean right up against Sans. "What else is coming to mind? Oh, do you remember our last battle? It was only the last timeline, I thought that would have been the first thing you thought of."

What would happen if they stuck their finger into the glowing socket?

"Heh, oh I'm remembering a whole lot about you now," the skeleton grinned. "You sure do, uh, like giving folks a hard time, don'tcha?"

"You're supposed to say, 'bad time'," Chara corrected.

"Oh, have I said that, kiddo?"

"It's your _thing_. You'll say it for me right now, won't you?"

"Nah." Sans inched away from the human, upon noticing that their hand was getting uncomfortably close to his face.

Chara was going to say something else, but stopped to listen to the sound of banging pots and pans downstairs. "Oh, that sounds like Papyrus is awake." They smiled, and slid off the bed.

" **Wait.** " Sans grabbed hold of their arm.

"Yes, Sans?"

"Where do you think you're going?"

"To go see Papyrus, of course."

A look of fear flashed across the skeleton's face, and he tightened his hold on their arm. "A kid like you isn't going anywhere _near_ Papyrus."

"On days like this, kids like you..." Chara quoted.

"Was that something I said, too?"

"Every time~"

"You know what... Alright. I'll say it, just for you, kid." Despite that they were in his bedroom, Sans had little issue with summoning the Gaster Blasters. " **Are you ready to have a bad time?** "

Chara's grin grew wider, and they reached for the weapon they had been carrying around with them.

* * *

Papyrus' cooking was barely what could be called 'edible', but it was better than nothing. While the skeleton did his thing, Flowey was going around behind him, fixing things as seen fit. Due to hundreds of years worth of timeline resets, he could safely say that he knew a thing or two about cooking.

"Perhaps we could invite over the entire town for a big spaghetti breakfast!"

"Oh, that sounds like fun, Papyrus!" As if any of it was for them.

Flowey didn't know how much damage Sans would be able to do so early in the timeline, but if it was anything like when Chara fought him normally, then his precious sibling would be dead in a couple of turns.

Just then, speaking of which, the sound of the Gaster Blasters rang through the entire house. The flower's eyes widened.

"Sans?!"

"Papyrus, hang on."

Chara, please be alright.

"Flowey, you can keep an eye on the spaghetti. I, the great Papyrus, will only be a moment." The skeleton was about to go upstairs.

"What? Where are you going, Papyrus? I'm sure Sans is just fine."

"Even so, I must check on him. You heard that sound, didn't you? I'll bet it was another one of my brother's terrible nightmares, which have been plaguing him very recently!"

"If that's the case, then I think that Sans would really appreciate at least one plate. Don't you think so?"

"Well..." Papyrus stopped to think. How rare~ "I suppose. However terrible Sans is feeling, my cooking will surely make him feel better!"

"Absolutely! What a good brother you are."

* * *

Sans wasn't as strong as usual. Of course, Chara never fought him until closer to the end of each timeline. Since this was right at the beginning, naturally there hadn't been any time to prepare. Thus, the human avoided each blaster with the grace of someone who had done so literally a thousand times.

A battle in Sans' tiny bedroom, however, was certainly more difficult than a battle in the cathedral-like room which they usually fought in. It wasn't an issue, as Chara adored any change to routine, however, it made it impossible to completely avoid damage. Not to mention that each of the skeleton's non-blaster attacks were tipped with poison, as usual. That was why Flowey rarely joined them against Sans, as the combination of poison and Chara made him rather uncomfortable.

Weak or not, Chara was about as giddy as they always were against him.

"So much for taking you out in a couple of turns." Sans was panting.

How does a skeleton...?

"Even so, you're fantastic, Sans."

"You think so, kid?"

"Mhm~ Even without all that Determination," now it was Sans' turn to dodge the human's attacks, "you can still hit me. You can _hurt_ me, Sans. That's amazing!"

The two of them were circling around the room. Chara's attacks were... overwhelming, to say the least. So much so, that half of the battle was just Sans trying to keep his balance.

When it got too much, Sans backed into his bed, and tumbled onto it. Chara took the chance to climb over top of him. "You know, sometimes you're the only reason I kill anyone... As it turns out, I don't even need to anymore. I can just come right to you as I please. Isn't that nice?"

Just saying that seemed to bring some ease to Sans. Chara smiled. They leered closer to the skeleton's face, and whispered; "Not that I'll actually stop."

"I guessed as much." Sans glared at them, "You'll never stop. It's just not in your nature."

The human giggled. They dropped their weapon to the side, and grabbed his skull. "What do you think, could I tear it off?"

"Try it." Several Gaster Blasters appeared over them. They would have fired immediately, had there not been a loud knock on the door right at that moment.

"Sans?"

Everything froze.

"Whatever happened, worry not! My friend and I have prepared for you a superb dish of only my best spaghetti!"

Chara turned to look at the door. "Oh Sans, did you hear that?"

"Papyrus..." San's eyes widened, "Papyrus, don't-!"

"Since you're up now, we've thought of many different fun activities for us to do until morning!" The door swing wide open, and Papyrus took no time in going to his brother's bed. At first, he didn't notice anything out of the ordinary, but once he registered a fourth person in front of him, a look of utter confusion found its way to his face. "Sans... who is that?"

"Papyrus, leave."

"Wait, are they hurt?!"

"Papyrus..."

The human grinned, "Greetings, my name is Chara!"

"Chara? ...What a nice name! I am Papyr..."

In-between their greetings, Chara had picked up their weapon once more. As soon as they did, the Gaster Blasters fired.

Honestly, it surprised Papyrus more than Chara. As he stood there in absolute shock, the plate of spaghetti dropped out his hands. Luckily for him, his good ol' pal Flowey was there to catch it. Pasta in hand, additional vines came into the room, and grabbed hold of the Gaster Blasters.

"Sans, what is going on...?"

Flowey rushed to his sibling's side. "Chara... Chara, are you alright?"

Said human slipped off Sans, and rolled onto the floor. They were bleeding all over, but despite that, they still had that grin. "Wow, that really hurt."

Sans looked as if he was about to jump on them. More vines rushed in, and tackled him down; holding him in place. Papyrus looked to be at a total loss.

"Aren't I so lucky to have you here to protect me?" Chara stroked one of their brother's petals.

"Chara, eat this spaghetti. I'm surprised you're still breathing."

The human didn't so much as look at the pasta, before turning their nose up at it. "I'm not eating that. I'll probably lose more health than I'll gain."

"It's not _that_ bad! I'd never let you eat something only made by Papyrus. I was helping him the whole way through."

"Hey, highness." Sans muttered, "Pap's cooking has gotten pretty good lately, you know?" He got a response in the form of a thorn to the side.

"Anywho, there's still a whole pot downstairs. So don't worry, Flowey's got you covered~"

Chara blinked. "My... you've been busy, Asriel. Did you go through all that trouble for me?"

"Well, _someone_ didn't want to take Mother's pie, and _someone_ also decided not to buy any food from around Snowdin. I couldn't just let you walk into battle without a single item, and this is Sans we're talking about."

"Well, I don't want it."

" _Why?_ "

"I have a goal that I'd like to accomplish." Chara said in a matter-of-fact way.

"The only thing you're going to 'accomplish' is making yourself look like an _idiot_."

Was Asriel giving them sass twice in one timeline?

"Come on, I promise you'll like it~" A wink.

They frowned, but there was no denying that they were only going to last a few more turns, and so they gave the spaghetti a try. "...Actually, this isn't bad at all. It's, dare I say, normal."

Flowey made the brightest smile he could manage. "See? I _told_ you~!"

"You certainly did~" Chara cast away any of their annoyance, and kissed the flower on the forehead. Funny enough, the item turned out to be much stronger than either of them thought, and Chara's health was filled almost entirely.

Perhaps it was because the spaghetti was made with the love for one's sibling? That sounds so silly.

"Sans, are you alright?" Papyrus could be heard.

"Never been better."

"Sans, please. ...Flowey, you can let go of him now, I will personally make sure that he does not hurt your friend any further, you do not need to worry."

Flowey stared up at him, as if contemplating what he should do.

Chara leaned into their brother's space. "You should kill Papyrus."

"You don't seriously think that I can serve spaghetti by myself, do you?"

"I'm fine now, I can keep fighting."

 _Really?_

"Maybe for another three turns. Do you think it's funny to throw away all my help?"

" _ **Asriel...~**_ "

Without another word, Flowey gave up arguing. As much as he loved them, there just wasn't any winning against them. More vines came rushing in through the balcony door, and wrapped around Papyrus' spine.

"Flowey-?"

Sans' eye seemed to glow even brighter just then, and the Gaster Blasters freed themselves from Flowey's hold. No sooner than they did, had they blasted straight through the vines around his brother.

"Wait." Flowey's eyes narrowed. "You mean you could escape at any time?"

Sans waved a glowing finger in the air, and grinned. "Probably. You disappointed?"

The plant looked up at his sibling, who seemed to be… very much the opposite of "disappointed".

"Papyrus, you should, uh, probably leave."

"S-Sans, I…"

"Come on, bro. Before those two try something, you know?"

The younger skeleton obviously didn't want to leave. He was a future member of the royal guard, and his brother was in trouble. Not only that, but it was one of his best friends who was apparently attacking him! At least, that's what Papyrus had gathered.

"I'm… Sans, no. I'm not leaving. Not until I know everyth-"

More vines appeared from all directions, from places where they didn't know Flowey could access. They flew towards him, and every one of them was stopped by Sans' blue attack, just before they were able to reach Papyrus. The newly recoloured vines dropped to the ground, and several bone attacks fell down upon them to hold them in place.

"Paps, seriously, _get out_."

Finally, Papyrus listened.

He bolted out from the room. Chara automatically followed him, but stopped when the door was closed behind him. Seeing that the skeleton was gone now, they didn't try to push the matter any further. However, before they had the chance to move away from the door, several bones shot out from it.

"Ch-Chara!"

The aftermath of the attack wasn't a desirable sight to see, but it didn't kill the human, despite them having been impaled by it. The bones released them, and sunk back into the door. After falling to the floor, they gave Flowey a thumbs-up gesture.

The flower had very little time to be relieved, before Sans assaulted them with various other attacks.

" _Stop that!_ " Flowey hissed. A few vines covered over his sibling in a vain attempt to shield them.

"Asriel, I'm fine~ Honestly, you're so..."

Sans' eyes become hollow. A Gaster Blaster appeared from every direction around the human, and they all fired at once. Chara's soul broke without any further resistance.

The flower stared at the spot where his sibling had been only a moment ago. "S-Seriously?"

A low chuckle could be heard from Sans. "Get… _dunked on._ "

Flowey looked over to him, and wasted no time before attacking. A line of bullets appeared from all around the skeleton, and immediately they began closing in on him.

Obviously he was too lazy to move, not that he could anyway. He wouldn't go down without a fight, however, and the Gaster Blasters circled around the flower.

That's when the timeline reloaded, and suddenly Flowey was standing outside of Snowdin once more.

* * *

Chara was back in one piece, as they should be. They were laying down in the snow, looking up at the ceiling of the underground. "If we're underground, how does it snow?" they asked.

"Oh…" Flowey took a moment to readjust himself to the reload. He grinned, "Magic, probably."

"Magic, of course."

Boy, they sure did seem calm for someone who had just died. Then again, the siblings were used to death. More than anyone should ever be.

"Are you alright? I mean~" Flowey bounced, "Of course you are, just like always! Why should this be different than any other reset, right, Chara?"

Chara laughed, and then patted a place in the snow next to them. "How come you're so far away, Asriel? Come closer~"

The flower blinked, then obeyed without a second thought. When Chara was lying down like that, Flowey could stare down at their face. _At Chara's face._

"Uh, so, what about Sans? Are we trying all that again? Do yourself a favour, and get yourself some items."

Chara grinned at him, "All in due time, mm?"

"Well, what are we doing right now, then?"

They reached up and pet him. "Sans isn't going anywhere. You could just… let me look at you for a while."

At first the flower thought that they were fooling around, but as they continued, his face softened. A vine emerged and wrapped around their arm.

"Chara…"

"You're cute."

He frowned at that, then looked away.

They giggled, leaning closer to their brother as they did so. "That isn't a bad thing~ Are flowers not supposed to be cute?"

Flowey responded by sticking his tongue out.

More laughter. They resumed petting him, which he had little objection to, and brought their attention to the false stars above them.

The duo continued lounging in the snow for a surprising amount of time. When the clocks are at your fingertips, there's no such thing as being in a rush.

Of course, even despite that, all good things must come to an end. As much as Flowey was enjoying himself, Chara eventually became restless. They twirled another one of their brother's vines in the snow, and as the minutes progressed, they absentmindedly began ripping it apart.

Flowey winced, though the pain wasn't anything noteworthy. Chara had done worse to him plenty of times before. Even so, the vine around their arm tightened in order to draw their attention off what they were doing.

"...Mm?" Chara stopped, and smiled at him. "Whatever is it, Asriel?"

"Uh… So, _Sans._ " Now was probably a good time to get back to business. "The poor sap's probably been sitting around for who knows how long, wondering when we're gonna show our faces again~"

Pfft, _sap._

"Oh, I sincerely hope so~" They ran a finger down their brother's stem.

"R-Right! So, now that we have a better idea what we're up against, we can get all the items we need, and we won't have to repeat what happened last time…"

Their smile faltered at the mention of items. Chara pulled their finger away from him, but a vine caught it, and pulled it back.

"This time, you're going to get some items to heal yourself with, right? You _are_ going to do that, right, Chara?"

"You keep making such a fuss over this…" the human mumbled. They forced their finger out of Flowey's hold, and slid the vines off their arm with some necessary effort.

They stood, and finally headed back into Snowdin.

* * *

Chara was all too eager to walk right past the item shop. However, before they had the chance to do so, multiple vines shot up, and blocked their path. " _ **Asriel.**_ "

Flowey smiled, but his voice hissed. " _We are not doing that again. You want to beat down that stupid skeleton? Then by golly, you are going to go in prepared._ "

Chara glared down at him with a look that would have terrified Flowey in past timelines. However, they clearly thought about what the flower said, because soon enough they gave him a much less ominous smile. "Very well, I promise to start taking better care of myself. After all, you're cuter when you're happy~"

A sigh of relief came to the flower. "How come you didn't want any items, anyway? You know that Sans is one of the strongest monsters around."

"That's because…" Chara knelled down in front of him, and bopped their foreheads together. "Think about it. If I defeat Sans without any items, with nothing but my Determination, he'll _have_ to bow to me. That's how strong I'll be."

" _Oh~_ You just want to be stronger, Chara? Well, a few more Genocide timelines should fix that right up!"

"I'm bored of fighting other monsters," the human said in a plain tone. "Every single one of them dies immediately. The only other monster who so much as stood a chance against me was Undyne, and that was only because she cheated. _There is only Sans_."

"I… I see. Well, that's no problem! Sooner or later, you're _bound_ to make Sans bow to you. You're _you_ , after all, Chara!"

"Yes, I suppose."

"How about you, uh, keep using items, though."

It was almost amusing how uncomfortable Flowey was made by the thought of them being harmed. It was almost as if they weren't a soulless creature of darkness~ Granted, Chara was the same thing, except that they were nothing _but_ a soul. Did that mean that the two of them completed each other?

Chara chuckled, and although they still didn't want to, they finally decided to go into the shop.

* * *

The rabbit monster who ran the shop seemed to be in the middle of closing up for the night. She _was_ up rather late, wasn't she?

"Is it too late to buy something?" Chara was looking at her from over the counter. She turned around, not seeming all that surprised to have a late customer.

"Not at all, you came just in time. What can I help you with, dear?"

"What do you have left in stock?"

"Let me just take a look…" She began pulling out whatever stock was left over from the day before.

As she did so, the human curiously watched her. They hadn't ever actually seen a shop being packed for the night. Either shops would be open for business, or were completely deserted. This felt more like how it would look pre-being deserted. Wasn't that interesting?

"Now, say, what kind of monster are you? I can't quite tell." Once she was finished, she leaned over the counter in a casual manner.

Chara tilted their head to the side as they thought. Though this wasn't the first time that a shopkeeper had asked them this, they were never quite sure how to answer.

They were human. However, the only thing that felt human-like to them was the vessel which they walked around in. They wanted to be a monster, and they had always thought of themselves more as such, but they knew that wasn't what they were. They were a ghost; a demon. At least, they had been. Now they had a body. Perhaps it wasn't _their_ body, but… It belonged to them. Only them. Frisk had no ownership over it. _Frisk_ belonged to them.

Frisk belonged to them just like Asriel did, and just like Sans did.

Of course, they couldn't tell a monster that they were a human. Failing to think of an answer in yet another timeline, they proceeded to wink at the rabbit. "I'm whatever will make a pretty face like yours smile~"

She burst out in a rather obnoxious sounding laugh. "Oh… Oh my, w-well, aren't you just the cutest!"

Chara made a little gesture, pressing their fingers into their cheeks.

"Tell you what, you can have whatever your little heart desires. How does that sound?"

"Anything I want? That might be kind of difficult, I don't think you'll fit in my box~"

Another laugh.

"Oh, _but if you insist,_ I suppose I could take one or two things."

Chara more or less robbed her, not that she'd have noticed or cared. They took as many items as their inventory could hold, along with that bandanna that had once belonged to one of the human souls. What did anyone else need that for, anyway? They left the shop, blowing a kiss to the lady as they did so.

"I thought you had gold." Flowey was waiting outside for them, while wearing a bitter smile on his face.

"Jealous? There's more where that came from~"

"Ch-Chara. Let's just go kill that skeleton now."

"We're going to kill Papyrus, as well."

"Oh. ...Well~" Flowey bobbed up and down on his stem. "Sure! Absolutely! Why not!"

Chara giggled, and then they went on their way.

* * *

Once they reached the skeleton's home, the human was lifted up to the balcony without needing to tell their brother to do so.

They leaned against the bars, and smiled down at him. "Bring Papyrus over to this room. Alright?"

"Of course, Chara!" Flowey was already on it.

They lingered on the balcony long enough for the flower to caress their cheek as he entered Papyrus' room.

* * *

Perhaps it was because they had wasted so much time before returning to the house, or that things were just a little different in this reload, but Sans was already sitting on his bed, wide awake.

"Hey, kid." He waved with as little effort as possible. "I was beginning to think that maybe you had gotten bored. Went to find something else to do, someone else to give a hard time."

"Morning, Sans." Chara chirped, "I thought you would have still been asleep. Did you wake up just for me?"

"Heh, 'cause I need more of you like I need a hole in my skull."

That could be arranged.

"Nah, I just happened to wake up early. More like I fell right out of bed, but you know."

"Aw, really?" They jumped up on his bed, and sat up against him. "Did you hurt your big bone head? I could kiss it better."

His eye glowed the moment they came into contact.

The smile they wore transformed into something closer to a smirk. "Since you did realize that I would be returning, I'm surprised that you don't have Papyrus in here with you. Were you too lazy to get out of bed? You always did have a habit of not acting until it's too late."

He was about to say something, but stopped mid-breath when the human climbed onto his lap.

"Well, that's perfectly alright! Either way, it wouldn't have made my job any harder."

"Your… _job,_ huh?"

"Mhm." They leaned their head into his shoulder. "Sans, I have a confession."

No response.

"The truth is," they began twirling their hair, "I don't actually think Asriel is as cute when he's a flower. He used to have such big, fluffy ears. I always liked pulling them."

Why was the kid telling him this?

"Oh, don't misunderstand me, he's still very cute, but..."

"Where _is_ , uh, 'Asriel' right now?" Whatever effort Sans was making was going into not looking at them.

"With Papyrus."

And just like that, the glow from Sans' eye seemed to explode with energy. Before the Gaster Blasters could be summoned, however, Chara knelt up, and jabbed their hand into the glowing socket.

Instantly, he shoved them away from him, and they tumbled down onto the floor.

"Wait, let me see that again." They got back to their feet, and reached towards his socket once more. "Was something actually in there?"

"Nope."

They were lifted up into the air, and thrown against the wall. Finally motivated to get out of bed, Sans headed to the door. Though before he could reach it, Chara grabbed one of the bones of his leg. They gave it a hard yank, and he fell over. He had to grab the human's arms and hold them away from him, to stop Chara from climbing over top of him.

Then from the hallway, they heard Papyrus exclaiming, "However, he should at least be awake before noon!"

"Well hey, maybe he's awake right now. Didn't you hear something coming from his room?" There was Flowey's voice.

The door opened.

"...Sans?" Papyrus looked around the room, puzzled when his brother wasn't in his bed.

Of course, there they were on the ground right at his feet.

"Hey, Bro." Sans smiled, shoving Chara off once more. The human laughed, and then waved to their own brother.

Flowey raised an eyebrow. What exactly had he missed while he was busy with Papyrus?

"Sans! What are you… Er, who is that?"

"Greetings! My name is Ch-" In mid-sentence, they were lifted up into the air, and slammed down onto the floor.

"Sans?!"

"Heh, no worries, Bro…" Sans stood. "You should go back to bed, y'know? I'm fine. It's way too early, you should be _bone_ tired." As he spoke, he continued throwing the human around, much to Flowey's discomfort. "Everything's _fine._ "

"S-Sans, _what_ are you _doing?_ " Papyrus knelled down in front of him, and grabbed his arm. "Release whoever that is, this instant!"

"Nope. No can do, Paps. They weren't here for a friendly visit, I can tell you that much."

"What? Why _were_ they here, then?"

"Ask him." Sans lazily pointed towards the flower, who narrowed his eyes.

"...Flowey?" The younger skeleton looked over his shoulder at him.

The flower wasn't sure what to say. Or rather, there were so many things that he could say, he didn't know which line to go with.

He chuckled. "Oh my. Look at little ol' me being put here in the spotlight."

"Whatever is going on, my friend?"

He made the brightest grin he could manage. "The person who your brother is mercilessly beating down like an insect just so happens to be my precious sibling! Golly, I guess this is your first time meeting."

"Uh huh." Sans nodded, his eye glowing all the while. "And what else?"

"What else? Well~" As Flowey spoke, that skeleton continued tossing his sibling around without a care in the world. The more this happened, the more his words faltered, or the more he would flat-out forget what he was saying, while in the midst of saying it. Eventually it really got to him. " _Hey, Smiley Trashbag, you're putting way too much effort into ticking me off._ "

Once he said that, the skeleton seemed to cease his assault, and left Chara floating in the air. They were bleeding, which bothered Flowey to no end.

"How about we cut right to the chase. Sound fun? Chara and I have really been craving some **L.o.v.e.** lately, and, well~ we thought that because you're all such _great_ pals… that you'd give us exactly what we want." Vines began slipping into the room from all over the place. "What do you think? _How much_ _ **L.O.V.E.**_ _are you worth?_ "

Sans' eye flared up, but before he was able to act any further, a vine grabbed his arm. With a single, sudden jerk, it was pulled right out from him. His automatic response was to hunch over, and in doing so, Chara was freed from his hold.

"S-Sans!" Papyrus pulled his brother into an embrace. "Flowey… what did you _do?!_ Just what has gotten into you?!"

The flower cackled, and his sibling joined in with him. Chara picked up the detached arm, and held it close to their chest. They took full pleasure when it turned to dust as they were holding it.

"I'm… fine." Sans lied. "Papyrus, you… you need to leave. Seriously, get out."

"N-No, I'm not leaving you. I am the great Papyrus, and I just need to figure out what's really going on, and why..."

"Come _on_ , didn't you see what happe-" He stopped, and clenched the socket where his arm had been before.

"Flowey, you are one of my most closest and dearest of friends." Papyrus turned to face the flower. "Please, why are you doi-"

Flowey simply smiled. As he did, a vine wrapped around the younger skeleton's head, and popped it right off. It rolled onto the floor at Sans' feet. He only had a moment to look at it, before it was picked up by Chara, who gave it a quick kiss before it turned to dust.

The rest of the body lingered. That was soon corrected by multiple other vines rushing in to grab it, and to poof the remainder of it with one last squeeze.

The only thing Sans could do was stare. Funny enough, Papyrus hadn't even been dead for a second yet, and there were already tears.

Chara scooped up a handful of the dust. "Wow, Sans~ You look a little _rattled_ , no?" They stood on the tips of their toes in front of the skeleton, and giggled as they poured the dust over his head.

While their hands were over him, he grabbed both their wrists with his remaining hand. " **Hey, kid.** " he muttered, " **How about leaving the puns to me?** "

Seemingly unphased, they tilted their head to the side, and their laughter escalated.

A vine wrapped around the skeleton's hand, and gave it a jolting squeeze, forcing him to release them.

They took out a Bisicle from the shop, and winked to Sans as they took a bite out of it. Sans' expression darkened as he watched, and a grimace formed across his face.

Once they were done eating the Bisicle's first piece, they dropped the wrapper on the floor, and kicked it to the side. It wasn't as if the room was clean to begin with.

That's when Sans managed to overcome his shaking bones, and two bone attacks came flying towards the human. Both of which were perfectly sidestepped. Chara stepped forward and leaned into his space. They reached up, and stroked under his eye.

Sans caught their wrist once more. "Hands off, Bucko."

"Oh, but Sans… I still have a _bone_ to pick with you."

That's when the Gaster Blasters were summoned from all around them, and they fired without holding anything back. It was a strong attack, but wasn't enough to kill. Not that Sans wanted to kill the human, that wouldn't fix anything. They'd only come back. Determination is a terrible thing, isn't it?

Chara stumbled back, and finished up the second half of the Bisicle. In doing so, they recovered whatever health that the blasters took from them. After, they pulled out their weapon, and made their turn to attack.

From this point on, Flowey seemed to back out of the conflict. This mattered little to his sibling, who was more than happy to have Sans all to themselves.

The battle had much of the same restrictions as the last reload, what with how tiny Sans' bedroom was.

He threw them against the ceiling, and dunked them down into the tread-mill. He gave them no time to recover, before dragging them across the floor, and sending several of those bone attacks down upon them.

For each bone, they rolled out of the way. As they did so, however, a Gaster Blaster appeared from their side, and managed to give them a good shock.

They coughed, and reached for an item. Sans took the chance to step onto them, and hold them down. "I'm not gonna lie, kid. This is pretty tiring."

Already? But they had just started.

Typical that even when his brother was dead, Sans was still too lazy to anything.

"I don't mind if you fall asleep." They smiled.

The skeleton seemed to remember something when they said that, and he chuckled. "Yeah… I'm sure you don't." He stepped off, and another fleet of bones rained down upon them. Once again, they rolled out of the way, and took a bite of an item as soon as they had the chance to.

They lunged for the skeleton, and grabbed him by the neck. They couldn't suffocate him, or anything of the like, but maybe they could fiddle around until something came off.

"Hey, you know, I wouldn't exactly call it 'fair' that when you get hurt, all you have to do is eat something, and then suddenly everything is better for you."

"Sans, let me see your eye again."

"Can't, don't have one."

"Or whatever is in that hole~ Is it _fire?_ " They were pressing against his spinous processes, imagining them like the valves of a trumpet.

Sans had a trumpet, which he played whenever Papyrus failed at something. It was knocked over in the corner of the room. Maybe in a future timeline, Sans could teach them how to play it. Then they could have duets together. They could play all of Chara's favourite songs.

If they were to be completely honest, they'd say that Sans was actually just as fun to casually hang out with as he was to ki- Oh.

A bone struck them from behind. They didn't release him, but their grip loosened enough for him to push them away. This bone had actually managed to go all the way through them, which left them in a moment of confusion.

"Mm...?" Once they realized that they had apparently fallen to their knees, they laughed. "Oh, you did it, Sans! Look at me, down here like the loser I am."

Sans stared at them. Though his eye continued to glow, his expression had become even darker than it was already. He looked to be as hollow as he probably actually was.

"Chara?" Their praise to the skeleton had instantly caught Flowey's attention. Who knew what he was doing through that whole battle, probably staring at the walls.

It wasn't actually an issue. Everyone gets stabbed now and then, obviously. All they had to do was eat another one of those items, and then everything would be-

They were lifted into the air, and thrown back and fourth between two walls. Each time, the bone moved around in a seesaw-like fashion. As this happened, the Gaster Blasters followed them, and fired whenever they were close enough to the human.

"H-Hey! What do you think you're doing?!" Flowey called out, as he watched Chara be tossed around like nothing. His vines appeared once more. The first thing he did was grab his sibling. After that, a vine wrapped around Sans, and began throwing him around in a similar manner to what he had been doing.

Chara was set down safely on the floor, and their brother took the liberty of pulling the bone out. It didn't hurt more than anything else, but they winced anyway.

Once that was all settled, they took out a Cinnamon Bun to eat, and watched Sans with a wide grin. "You're so ruthless, Asriel."

The skeleton was slammed down into his dresser, picked up once more, and then slapped against the door.

"...That's enough, you'll kill him."

The flower withheld his wrath, and his sibling went over to sit beside Sans, who was just laying on the floor. "I thought you wanted him to die."

"Of course I do! I just have to see something first." Nothing was going to stop them this time.

Sans groaned, as he held his skull. "You two really know how to play fair, don'cha?"

The human's grin hadn't disappeared. They grabbed his skull, and turned it over to the side. The moment they did so, the eye burst into that ball of energy once more.

Sans knew what was up, just like he ought to! Though it wasn't as if they hadn't been constantly asking about it. It's just that he never gave them a proper answer.

"Asriel, hold him down."

A series of bones came flying towards the human, but they didn't make it very far before being blocked by their brother. Vines weaved in and around each of the skeleton's bones, all while successfully wearing down any further resistance.

Wasn't it cool how strong their brother was when he wanted to be?

Sans gave them the nastiest glare he could manage. Surprisingly, however, it didn't actually last that long.

Why was it surprising?

"...Heh." He closed his eyes, and his expression became somewhat more content. "Welp. I guess I'm beat." His eye stopped glowing. "So I guess you're, uh, just gonna kill me now, like Papyrus?"

Did they tell him to cease his magic? _Make it glow again._

"Are you feeling alright, Sans? Acceptance isn't a good look for you." Chara frowned. Looking at the eye would be pointless without its magic energy.

"Acceptance? Nah, far from it. Unlike you, I just know when to quit."

"Well, _stop it_."

"What's that expression for, kid? You won, so uh, go have a drink and celebrate, or whatever it is that you do whenever you kill me."

They decided to go for it, and slipped their hand into his socket once more. Maybe the glow would return once Sans realized what was happening. It wasn't as surprising to him as the first time they did it, but Chara could feel him jolt upon entry.

Flowey tilted to the side, and then leaned in closer to see what they were doing.

They were going to order Sans to activate his magic once more, but decided against it. They didn't want to mess around with him, they genuinely wanted to see what the eye felt like. If they simply asked, they knew that he would reject them, and cautiously avoid doing it as a result.

So instead, they felt around. They digged, scratched, pressed, and he had no choice but to let them. It was just like going to the dentist, except not for your teeth.

"Oh Chara, he's shaking." Flowey smirked.

They weren't particularly paying attention to that.

This reminded them of a ritual that would happen back in the human village they were born in. As well as that, it was also similar to those school dissections that Frisk had once told them about.

Sans was a humanoid skeleton, so was this what their own eye socket felt like, as well?

What was Asriel's like?

...Oh? Wait. There it was~!

Once more, the eye burst up in that magic flame. The poor thing was a nervous wreck by now, though Chara didn't believe they were doing anything that should be overly painful. Did it just feel weird? How weak, not that they were really complaining. This was what they wanted.

At long last, they were able to live out their daily dream.

Sans began fighting more again, but their brother did his best to keep him held down. There wasn't any reason for concern. After all, even if Sans had changed his mind about giving up, that still didn't make him any less lazy. Really though, this should feel like a back massage. Except not for your back.

When they touched the magic energy, their hand phased through it. It felt rather odd to touch, and it stung.

Raw energy belonging to Sans.

That was exciting~

They closed their hands over it, pretending to grab it. The energy seeped through their fingers, creating an outlined glow.

A vine leaned against their wrist, and they gave Flowey room to enter the socket.

Aw, did he want to join them?

He had done this before, but not while Chara was there. With those hundreds of years worth of resets, if something was physically possible to do, Flowey probably did it.

Flowey left the flame alone for the most part, since that's what Chara was focusing on. Instead, he was feeling around, seeing how smooth the bone was.

This continued for much longer than it needed to, but they didn't stop until Chara was satisfied with everything they had discovered. Once they pulled away from the skeleton, they immediately gave him the final blow.

"H-Heh… ow."

Chara had heard more interesting last words before, but to be fair, this was probably the fortieth time that Sans had died recently. Not every 'last words' could be profound.

"See you later, Sans." they smiled down at him. He didn't respond, not that he needed to. He always took longer to turn to dust than other monsters did, and so, Chara patiently sat beside him until he did.

* * *

With both skeleton brothers dead, the house was oddly quiet. For a rather long amount of time, neither of the royal siblings were saying anything. At least, Chara was preoccupied, and Flowey wasn't sure what they wanted to do next.

Was that it for this timeline? The human wasn't mentioning anything about resetting yet.

Chara seemed quite happy to sit on the floor, playing in the dust. When they did speak, it was with a big, pleased grin. "Look Asriel, rain!" They scooped up a handful of dust, and poured it over the flower.

"C-Come on, that's really mature of you." Perhaps he shouldn't have said anything as they were pouring. He could have sworn that some of the dust flew into his mouth when he did. "Besides," cough, "that looks nothing like rain."

" _Torrential_ rain, Asriel. Just like in Mother's book."

Flowey shook himself in an attempt to get as much dust off as possible. A vine pushed the dust around him back into the pile.

"So, Chara~"

"Mm?"

"How do you feel? Stronger?"

"Hm…" They were making two separate piles. One for Sans, and one for Papyrus. They had to make sure that the piles had no chance of being mixed together. "I think so. Sans always gives me a lot of EXP. How much does Papyrus give you?"

"I hate to brag, but I reached the level cap a long time ago~"

"Really?" They touched their cheek to feign shock. "And yet sometimes you still lose?"

"H-Hey, well, power isn't everything, right?"

They smiled, and booped the center of the flower's face. "You're weak~"

"Am not!"

"You're weaker than a Whimsun~!"

Flowey cracked a grin, "Don't compare me to such a lowly creature!"

"You're so weak, a Whimsun could stand on you and not know any differently!" The human cackled. They leaned forward, not caring if they got dust over themselves.

"That would never happen to me, I am the Whimsun's prince!"

"It wouldn't know that!" They were both laughing. "You're just an adorable little flower, with a cute face!"

"Well, _this_ adorable flower will kill any Whimsun that dares to even think such a thing~"

"No way, it'll just beat you up, and then you'll have to cry to me for help."

"As if. Are you forgetting that I have taken the souls of every monster in the entire underground for at least five times now?"

"Oh~ You did what now?"

Flowey's smile strained. "Wait… you don't remember?"

A blank stare, followed by tilting their head with a smirk. "Don't be stupid, of course I remember those timelines."

" _Oh._ " Haha. "Yeah, stupid me."

Chara giggled, and nuzzled into their brother's forehead. "Honestly, you're such an idiot~ I wouldn't forget that cool looking form you take on. You almost looked like how you used to, before…" They stopped themselves from mentioning anything unpleasant.

One of the few filters they had.

Truthfully, nothing made Flowey happier than knowing that his death bothered Chara, just as much as their death bothered him.

"Hey, what do you think is on TV this early in the morning?" He changed the subject.

"TV…?" Chara sat up straight, "Probably Mettaton's channel. I don't think he sleeps."

The skeletons were some of the few monsters who had a television, though TV was growing in popularity.

"Did you… want to watch it, Asriel?" They didn't particularly care either way. As far as they were concerned, their brother could decide how rest of this timeline was spent.

"Oh, well." the flower glanced to the side, "We could do something else."

"Heh~" Chara began scooping up the dust, and held out their shirt like a pouch to carry it in. "Come on, Sans, let's go watch Mettaton's show."

They stood, and headed out the door. "Who knows, perhaps it'll be that episode that you said you liked. What was it, when Mettaton was decorating a cake? You said it was rather charming, and that it _almost_ inspired you to actually go and do something~"

Their voice trailed off, and laughter could be heard from downstairs.

Sometimes Flowey wished that he could turn to dust whenever he died, so that Chara could act that way with him. Normally instead, he would just turn back into a regular old flower. After all, he wasn't truly a monster anymore. That part of him died, and stayed dead.

By the time he joined them, Sans' dust had been carelessly dumped all over the floor, and they were already lounging on the couch as if they owned the place.

Who was going to tell them that they didn't?

The television hadn't actually been turned on yet. Were they waiting for him? Like the amazing brother that he is, he turned it on so that they wouldn't need to.

Just as they had guessed, Mettaton's show was playing. It was actually an episode that neither of them had seen yet. What a novelty!

"Asriel~" Chara held an arm out, and he wrapped around it quite happily.

They had never really cared for Mettaton's reality show routine, but just the fact that they were seeing something new was enough to draw their attention into it.

They continued watching, even after that episode had ended. The next one that came after that was a rerun that Flowey had seen, but Chara hadn't.

"Aren't you glad we left the Ruins early this time?" As they had been watching, Flowey had traveled all the way up their arm, and wrapped loosely around their neck. They reached up, stroked down the side of his face. "Just look at what we were missing out on before."

"Sure, but you know, Chara, soon this will be just as boring to us."

"Mm, I suppose." They leaned into the arm of the couch. "However, don't you think that this is nice while it's still new?"

"If only it would last." He glanced down at the dust. "Are you going to reset, so you can kill that skeleton again?"

"Yes, but... not now." They yawned, and adjusted their position on the couch.

"What are you going to do now?"

"I want to see what else happens." They stared at the TV. "There are a few more hours before we normally leave the Ruins."

"So what, you're just going to lay here, and watch Mettaton until then? Boy, you're just as lazy as Sans is!"

Chara smiled. "Just like Sans…"

Flowey blinked when his sibling closed their eyes.

Were they tired? Well, actually, normally at the start of each timeline, Chara would sleep at home for a while.

He stared at their face for a little longer than necessary, before a vine went upstairs, and returned with a blanket.

Chara hadn't said anything about going to sleep on purpose, but they didn't reject being covered. Of course, once they'd awaken, it would be past the time when they left the Ruins. It didn't really matter. They were just going to reset, anyway.

"Asriel?"

"Yes, Chara~?"

"You're making it hard to breath."

"Oh. Heh, sorry." He uncurled from their neck.

"That's better."

It was quiet after that, and eventually the human fell fast asleep.


End file.
